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The Helen Hayes Theatre, New York
Squonk
BigSmorgasbordWunderwerk created by
Steve O'Hearn and Jackie Dempsey
March 24, 2000
Review by Andrew Yarrows
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Adia (not to be confused with the similarly spelled and, I hear, absolutely hideous Aida) and I decided to see a show on Friday night. We chose Squonk because we were looking for something a little bit “offbeat,” despite the fact that we were briefly tempted by 50% off Jesus Christ Superstar tickets at the TKTS booth. “Offbeat” is definitely what we ended up getting at Squonk, although that famous phrase of warning, “be careful what you wish for,” proved all too true. Never mind offbeat. Squonk went off the deep end.
About the most interesting thing in all of Squonk’s 80 minute running time was the eerie, beautiful voice of its “star,” Jana Losey, who looks like a cross between Natalie Imbruglia and the lead singer of the Cranberries (and she sounds a lot like the latter singer, too). The only other thing of note was the set, which consisted of several wildly inconsistent contraptions, ranging from a gigantic Cornucopia to a massive iron furnace which one member of the cast used to cook what appeared to be raw hot-dogs at one point. Such was the atmosphere of Squonk, random and without any cohesion of ideas, or greater meaning. It was full of visuals with nothing behind them, and the concept wore thin well before the show’s conclusion just over an hour after its beginning.
The cast consisted of five musicians, one playing an electric flute, one playing an accordion, one playing a large bass and the last playing the drums. It was hard to tell if the music was actually being played live at many points, or if it was being piped in over the sound system. In any event, much of it was loud and irritatingly shrill, the minority of it being lively and inventive. I can’t imagine listening to the CD version and really enjoying myself.
At various points in the performance, things resembled a rock concert more than they did a performance art piece, which is what Squonkreally is. Unfortunately, there was little or no point to these transitions, and much of the show became a monotonous blur of interactions between cast members that had no point, and complicated looking props that cluttered the stage more than they served the action at hand. Much of the set and the activities of the cast seemed designed to prevent audience boredom rather than to provoke thought or progress any kind of thematic presentation; the music, occasionally quite interesting, was the show’s main event. It’s unfortunate that the hideous sound design, combined with the rather awful acoustics of the Helen Hayes Theatre, made it nearly impossible to make out any of the lyrics being sung by Ms. Losey.
A number of audience members fled the theatre within the first 30 minutes, with even greater numbers making their exit after the halfway point. A particularly loud and obnoxious group of tourists sat directly in front of Adia and I, and they rudely talked throughout the entire first half hour before getting up, noisily, and making a stumbling exit from the theatre. I admit, I kept looking at my watch throughout the show because it wasn’t holding my attention at all, but it also wasn’t so terrible that I wanted to leave. It just wasn’t something that needed to go on for 80 minutes. An hour even, perhaps, or maybe 45 minutes, but not 80.
Serena Altschul (of MTV “fame”) has been stalking Adia and I, by the way. We’ve seen her twice this week, once at X and O uptown (roasting marshmallows at a table with what looked like a cigarette lighter) and the second time at Squonk.
While I’m at it, can someone please tell me if there is such a thing as Jersey Girl repellent? I’m serious. Walking anywhere in Manhattan on a Friday night means walking into throng upon throng of Jersey Girls. Not that I don’t find them amusing in a certain way, but I wouldn’t mind spraying myself down and warding them off so that I might actually be able to walk through Times Square without feeling assaulted on all sides by big hair, bad eye makeup and really inappropriate uses of animal prints and spandex.
It’s like, why bother with Squonk on a Friday night in Manhattan when you can walk one block down and get a full dose of Skank? Anyway, I’ll keep my eyes peeled for my spray, and hopefully pick a better show next time around.
-------Andy
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