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Selected Sermons
More Than a MealMay 2, 2004 Copyright © 2004 by Jennifer Bussberg. All rights reserved. I have been involved in the Community Supper for about 5 years. I came to this church for two reasons, to give back and to explore church. Growing up, I had never been exposed to church and, after the birth of my second daughter, I was feeling like there surely must be a higher power and that I knew I must give back because my life was so blessed. So, I came to church and I heard some pleas from perhaps Betsy or Harry or Lyn asking for volunteers down at the Community Supper. Hmmm…me and food ... always had a great relationship... and here was my chance to give back! I could do this! Sign me up! So easy to say you will try something new, but what was I getting myself in to? Who exactly would be coming to this supper anyway and what did I know about helping. At that time in my life, I was still fairly shy. I felt like a stranger in this church community, as well as the greater Milford Community. So, the first time I went to the supper I was nervous, anxious, and hesitant to mingle with who-knows-what-kind of people come to a “soup kitchen”. God (or whoever) please forgive me for being so uppity! When I left the first time, I truly felt like here was a place for me! 5 years later it is a part of who I am and who I have become. Leaving it all behind in June will be hard for me. There are so many experiences that I will take from the supper and the vast majority are positive. I have been so touched by how willing most everyone is to share their lives with you. The guests, the volunteers, the wonderful cooks, the members of our church, and even the folks at the Worcester County Food bank and Panera Bread. Of course, there were a few bad times way back in the beginning. Like when Richard barked at me for being in his way with hot food in his hands and I bit my lip the rest of the night so I wouldn’t cry. There was the time early on this year when a new gal came down for supper and wouldn’t leave. She told me how she had just gotten out of jail and was looking for some clothes and couldn’t stop touching everything in the kitchen. Cool, calm Luisa handled her beautifully and she never came back again. I was shaking in my boots! There was also “chocolate milk man” who just came to the supper to empty our supplies of chocolate milk and to try to sell his “stuff”, a watch, razors, you know, “stuff”. Don’t know what happened to him but he seemed to have moved on. Trumping those few “incidents” that had me uneasy, there are so many that have touched my life. Paulina, the dear woman who called every Sunday to ask what was for dinner and thanked us up and down as she left to try to covey her appreciation. Brian, our guest who is blind and who loves the oldies station on the radio. Over the years he has created some CD’s for us that he brings down for us to play at dinner. He loves to tell you what he is doing in his life and he was very fond of telling us about his girlfriend. Our little family that has just added a 3rd baby to their lives… we have been there for each addition along with the grandmother who has struggled with domestic violence and the aftermath. This is the tough stuff you “read” about or “study about” or think (at least I did) “won't affect your life”. Boy have I grown up in 5 years. The major lesson that I have learned at the Community Supper is that we are all people just doing the best we can. We all struggle, we all share, we all learn, and by golly, we all like to eat! And, we all take things for granted, unfortunately. This is the hardest lesson I have learned. He came to the supper every Sunday with a big smile, a huge appreciation, impeccable manners, and a sweet gentleness about him. I am sure he told me his name more than a few times but I am TERRIBLE with names. He sat at the back table, with the “regulars,” the ones that have been there since the beginning. He loved the company, he loved the food, and he never left without saying thank you. The summer came and went and as we opened for the new season he wasn't back, where was he? A few weeks into the fall, Howard told me the awful news that he had died of cancer over the summer. None of us knew he had been sick, he never complained, I felt so terribly sad and so angry that I didn't get a chance to tell him how much I enjoyed having him around. Lessons, lessons, lessons my friends. You want spiritual growth, here it is! On top of it all, dear Howard, on the Sunday he told us the news, he took the chair he had always sat in and hung it up on his table out of respect. “These” are the kind of people I was afraid of in the beginning. Yet, these are the people who have taught me so much. One of the things Robin had asked me to ponder in putting this together was “if I could give awards to the guests, I would give awards for…” At first, I thought of funny things like the most annoying, the pickiest, the chatterbug. Yet in really thinking about it, I would have to go with the one that has been through the most and has come out on the other side, or the one who has beaten the odds by COURAGEously battling breast cancer. The one that taught us all to slow down and not to rush through the meal and just savor the food, the company, and the conversation., or the one that you never thought about missing until he didn't come back. These are the things I have learned at the Community Supper. The Community Supper was the brainchild of a family from this church who moved out of state once it got up and running. We had a few regulars from the church supporting it as well as the UU churches in Franklin, Hopedale, Grafton, and some other small groups who found out about us. When I came along Lyn Cameron was in charge. I was happy to serve salad and food from the kitchen. But, as many of you know, one thing leads to another when you get involved with a church activity or committee and one day Lyn’s life changed and she was not going to be able to be the chairwoman I guess you would say. Please let me clarify that for the record the true team in charge without whom we would not be is Richard and Luisa Helfand, our cooks and our backbone! Anyway, another lesson this time of being a good UU is that nobody wants to be the one officially in charge, too much responsibility, what if I can't or don’t want to do it , what if god forbid I change my mind? And above all else, it takes up too much time…. Fast forward, Lyn goes on to ministry school and nobody is running the supper, other than Richard and Luisa. So, long story short I agree to do it. I wasn't exactly sure what that meant but ultimately it turned into a pretty sizable job. See, I never was good at saying no or disappointing anyone. So, I became the unallocated, unaware volunteer coordinator once Lyn left and in the end, I did everything but cook. In the midst of this, I had my third child by the way. As volunteer coordinator, I learned it was a lot of work and that I had better learn to delegate some of it. Meanwhile, the world was completely changed by the events of 9/11. Where prior to that we had to twist arms and beg folks to help us out, today we are turning people away. Bottom line lesson… there are so many folks who want to be involved with the Community Supper. So here we are in May, I am leaving at the end of June and we have a great many folks right here in this church and in the community who are dedicated to keeping the supper alive. We have gotten smarter, more creative and have thought about ways to allow busy people to make smaller commitments to the supper. We are going to do it in four “teams.” Each team with two people in charge of a designated Sunday. The Community Supper is a nourishing place. A place to eat, to work, to share and to fill you up. Everyone comes together and brings something different to the table. We all can share. |
