You may no longer be cool if...

1. You find yourself listening to talk radio.
2. You daughter says she got pierced and you look at her ears.
3. You fondly remember your powder blue leisure suit.
4. Your wife buys a flannel nightie and you find that sexy.
5. You criticize the kids of today for their satanic suicide-inducing music, forgetting that you rocked to Alice Cooper and Black Sabbath.
6. You call the police on a noisy party next door instead of grabbing beer and joining it.
7. You turn down free tickets to a rock concert because you have to work the next day.
8. When jogging is something you do to your memory.
9. Rocking all night means dozing off in your rocking chair.
10. Sex becomes "All that foolishness".
11. Getting a little action means your prune juice is working.
12. All the cars behind you turn on their headlights.
13. You remember the "Rolling Stones" as a rock group not a corporation.
14. You bought your first car for the same price you paid for your son's new running shoes.
15. You actually ASK for your father's advice.
16. You don't know how to operate a FAX machine.
17. When someone mentions SURFING you picture waves and a surf board.