First and foremost, your signature Sofitel bed is far too sumptuous, far too comfortable. I could not bring myself to get out of bed until noon and practically slept the whole day away!
Then, when I went outside I found myself steps away from both Times Square, Rockefeller Center and just a short distance from the Empire State Building. I got practically no exercise at all and did not get the unique experience of lunging for seats on New York's famous subway cars.
But I did not leave my room much. It was so beautifully decorated with spot-lit paintings, photos of old New York, organizational closets, and a travertine and marble bathroom with its giant soaking tub, that when I got home, I had to immediately tear up my whole house and redecorate, costing me a small fortune.
Speaking of which, I had to throw away all of my soaps and shampoos and replace them with the same Roger Gallet products that I became addicted to while staying in your hotel.
And, of course, I had to replace my brand new television with a giant flat screen that showed every bump on every actor's face, such as I became used to watching at the Sofitel.
The service I received was so professional and warm that I began talking to every stranger in Times Square, expecting them to treat me like the Queen of England, too.
And my dinner of duck and fois gras followed by hazelnut mousse in a little chocolate pouch in your French brasserie added back the few pounds I had just managed to lose.