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Chapter 3
The Wendy Roper Mystery

	Will walked silently next to Deanna as they made their way to
sickbay.  He didn't reach for her hand, testing to see if she would take
his. She looked up at him several times and smiled, but he knew it was a
sad smile. Strangers would nod at him as he passed, then turn away and
whisper at his blank nod back, aware he hadn't recognized them. Finally
they came to sickbay, entered and sat patiently waiting for Doctor
Crusher.
	"Will, please give us a moment." Doctor Crusher asked, then
turned to Deanna, "Counselor, please come to my office for a minute."
	 "Beverly, I have an appointment in a few minutes, I really
can't stay." Riker could tell Deanna was angry by the way she stood, both
feet widely planted apart, her head up as her aristocratic bearing reasserted
itself whenever she was cornered, as she was now.
	"This won't take long, I assure you." Crusher turned on her heel
and walked to her office. A reluctant Deanna, patted Will's hand and
followed.
	As soon as the door closed behind Deanna, the Doctor began, "Deanna,
I tried to reach you several times last night and early this morning to
discuss Will's case with you. Every time I asked the computer to locate
you the answer came you were in Commander Riker's quarters." Crusher
took a deep breath. "Just tell me you were sleeping on the couch."
	Deanna drew herself up to her full height. "I don't have to tell
you anything of the sort!"
	"Deanna," Beverly took another moment to calm herself, her
suspicions building. "I don't want either one of you to be hurt. You two
have a long history of driving each other crazy, and I don't want
personal entanglements interfering with his recovery."
	"You're right.  We have a long history together and the personal
Œentanglements' will have to be dealt with as part of his recovery. If
he were married, you wouldn't criticize his wife for being with him."
	"You aren't married!"
	"No." Deanna dropped her head in her hands, "we are bound much
closer than most married couples."
	"As long as your relationship doesn't impeded his recovery." Crusher
softened her voice. "Deanna, I've been counting on you to be his counselor.  Tell
me now if I should assign another psychologist to his case."
	Deanna burst into tears as shocked by her outburst as was Dr.
Crusher. "Yes, maybe you should."
	Beverly watched her friend, completely baffled. She had expected
the Counselor to be highly insulted at the suggestion, perhaps enough to
wake her up to her professional responsibilities. "Deanna, what has
happened?"
	Will watched the doctor and Deanna through the glass window of Crusher's office. 
Although he couldn't hear the words being exchanged, the body language
was easy to decipher. Deanna was upset at him for what he done last
night. Doctor Crusher was mad too. He didnŒt know how Crusher had
found out, but she also knew he done things he shouldn't have. Will
watched the two embrace, reconciled apparently.  Yes, he realized, what
had happened had been his fault. He had started kissing her first. She
had probably just gone along because she had felt sorry for him and
because she was too nice to tell him no.
	Captain Picard walked into sickbay to check on his First Officer.
"Ah, good, Will!  How are you this morning?"
	Riker looked up at Picard,"Captain," he said quietly. Picard
realized his First Officer was avoiding meeting Picard's eyes.
	Picard didn't like the change in his Number One officer.  He had
hoped to see some improvement, more of the old Will Riker today. He
could tell that Riker's mood was more subdued than he had been before.
"Here for another treatment?" Picard felt awkward making small talk even
with friends.
	"Do you think that will help?" Will asked Picard.
	"Well, Doctor Crusher knows best about that."
	"I don't think it will help." Will said simply.
	Picard could hardly believe the lack of spirit the statement
revealed. "Will Riker, I have never known you to give up.  Don't now. 
You will cooperate with the doctor and recover and resume your duties.
You have a distinguished career to continue, people who count on you and
I expect you to conduct yourself as the Star Fleet officer I have always
known you to be." Picard allowed his voice to echo his concern for the first
time, thinking maybe he had come across too harshly. "Do we understand each other?"
	Picard's speech was the longest he had given in Will's presence
since the accident.  Riker fought the tears that were coming to his
eyes, embarrassed that apparently even Picard realized he had not
conducted himself as an officer the previous evening. Will never stopped
to consider how all these people would know what he and Deanna had done
in the privacy of his quarters, but he never doubted that they did know.
Ashamed, Riker turned away from Picard too filled with remorse to even
reply.
	Recovering from her admission to Beverly regarding her decidedly
unprofessional conduct the night before, Deanna steadied herself in the
doctor's embrace. 
	"Deanna, it's okay, probably even to be expected.  My gods, he
idolizes you.  That kind of adoration is hard to ignore. Seducing a
virtual virgin Will Riker! Actually I doubt there are many woman on
board the ship could resist that prospect! You do have a problem though,
I hate to tell you."
	"What?"
	"Deanna, you are not on a fertilization-inhibitor, remember? I
tried to talk you into taking one for human males, but you insisted, it
wasn't necessary and of course you didn't need one for Klingon males."
	"Well, that shouldn't be a problem, Will's must be effective."
	Doctor Crusher shook her head. "Will's yearly injection was due
a week before the accident and he had been too busy to have it.  He had
scheduled his dose the day after the accident.  Because of his injury,
we never administered it."
	Deanna just stared at Doctor Crusher. "You mean I could be
pregnant?"
	"It should be easy to determine. Here." Dr. Crusher went over to
a side table and picked up a tricorder.  "No, you don't appear to be.  I
do want to run a full set of tests tomorrow, just to be sure. We had
better wait on administering an inhibitor for you though. Also, I can't
give Will one just yet. You understand what that means for tonight,
right?"
	Deanna nodded trying to desparately to accept this latest turn
of events.
	"Come on, Deanna, you two can abstain for one night."
	"You don't understand, Beverly.  My link to Will has been
reestablished."
	"Well, that's good, isn't it?  That might even accelerate his
recovery."
	Deanna fought to control her emotions again. "I thought so too,
but I was wrong.  Beverly, he's not the same man I loved. There is so
much more damage than I imagined. I'm so confused myself, I'm not sure I
can help him at all." Deanna was so preoccupied with her own emotions
that she never picked up on Will's until she heard Picard's tense call
for Doctor Crusher. She looked up and saw Will bent over, his fear and
shame hitting her simultaneously. She ran after Crusher to see what
could be causing such turmoil.
	People were asking Will questions all at once. Picard wanting to
know if he was in pain, the doctor wanting to know what had happened,
the nurse wanting to know if she should give him a sedative, but Deanna
stood to the side immobilized by Will's confusion. In the midst of the
chaos, he sought her out, focusing only on making her understand that he
had never wanted to hurt her. He fought to concentrate on reaching her,
he fought the distractions, he fought his inability to control the tears
and he stood up drawn to her though he feared she didn't want him
anymore. Deanna had turned away to try and compose herself in order to
help Will. She wasn't looking at him as he stood, but she recognized the
return of the familiar determination when it came to her mind, the
strong will struggling for control. When she turned back she knew his
spirit was injured, but not destroyed. This was the essence of the man
she had loved, who refused to give up when faced with impossible
obstacles, refused to back down from a dangerous situation, refused to
turn away even from a woman too scared to acknowledge how much she
wanted him. She turned, feeling his remorse, his guilt, his shame and
she understood the cause. They embraced in the middle of the sickbay
with Picard, Crusher and the nursing staff watching them. Deanna stepped
back, taking his hand. She led him into one of the consultation rooms
she often used with patients and shut the door. 
	"I'm sorry Deanna." he refused to face her. He stood alone, arms wrapped
around himself, struggling for something, but he wasn't sure what.
	Deanna brushed his hair back. "Will, tell me what you are
thinking."
	"Everyone knows.  Everyone knows I did something wrong last night.
You are mad at me too.  I didn't mean it.  I won't do it again, I
promise." When he turned at last to look at her he saw the warmth of
understanding had returned to her face.
	"Will, no one knows but you and me. Although I did just tell Dr.
Crusher. She thought it was wonderful. There is nothing wrong with what
we did."
	"Why were you mad at me?"
	"I wasn't mad at you.  I was mad at what happened to you. I was
mad that you have to go through this. I was mad you weren't angry by it.
Aren't you mad?"
	"No, most of the time it doesn't make me mad."
	"Why not?  It should!"
	"No." He tried to figure out how to tell her. We w,w,," he stopped
for a moment, taking a deep breath, "We weren't together before."
	"What do you mean? We were very close before the accident."
	"No. I know why we weren't together. You were afraid of me."
	Deanna wanted to protest, but didn't.  She recognized the challenge
he had issued so many years ago, though she knew he had no memory of the
time at the University when he had sat on the rock and first projected
to her. "You are afraid of me." he had sent. He had been right. She
realized he was still right. She was still afraid he would hurt her,
would leave her, would choose his own command over her leaving her
adrift with no way to recover herself. She had carried that fear right
up until the accident. The accident had left her with little reason to
fear those things, so she had refocused the fear on the loss of the
thing she had always resented most- his independence. He hadn't changed
nearly as much she realized, as she had.
	"I'm not afraid anymore, Will." She wrapped her arms around him,
comforting him, able to discern the existence, though faint, of
the myriad shades of feeling that she had come to associate with him.
"Promise me one thing." She asked.
	"What?" 
	"You won't stick to your promise not to repeat last night."
	Riker smiled back in agreement.

	Deanna dropped by shortly before lunch to take Will back to his
quarters after his latest session with Beverly.  Entering the sickbay
she saw him chatting happily with Data. Data was playing a tape of their
first encounter with Q, with Will listening fascinated to the crazy
scenarios that Q had put them through at Far Point station.
	"Hi Deanna." Will called though his back was to her as she
entered.
	"Ready to go for lunch?" she asked.
	"Perhaps the Commander would like to accompany me to ten-forward
for lunch," Data volunteered.
	"Do you eat lunch?" Will asked.
	"It is not necessary, but I can for social interactions.  I find
humans are more likely to relax and enjoy themselves when sharing food."
	"I'm sorry, Data.  The Commander needs to rest for a few hours,
doctor's orders!" Crusher interjected, knowing Riker would only be
confused by the bustling activities of the lunch time crowds.
	"Then perhaps you would care to attend our poker game tonight."
Data volunteered.
	"I don't know." Will looked over at Deanna as if seeking a reason to
not to attend the game.
	"We'll see, Data.  Maybe I can persuade the Commander to come."
Deanna promised.
	Back in his room, Deanna fixed lunch from the replicator while
Will started to listen to another log entry.
	"Personal log, William T. Riker. Yesterday started out as the
happiest of my life, and ended up the worst. Today, we finally made it
to the rendezvous point and returned from the Jalara Jungle and returned
with Lt. Tang to the city. I couldn't wait until the evening when I was
supposed to meet Deanna at her mother's.  I was so stupid. I started
imagining what it would be like to be connected to someone. To someone
with a family. To belong.  Fate can sure kick you in the teeth
sometimes. Deanna's mother, Lwaxanna Troi, met me in the door of the
house and wouldn't let me in. I knew something was up. She said I would
"dilute" her daughter's purpose in life.  I could have taken her
mother's rejection of me, but Deanna. I never expected her to turn me
away. That hurt. More than anything else. I wanted to convince her she
was wrong, but you can't fight for someone who wants no part of you.  I
thought she was different. I thought she loved me. I thought she cared.
No one is hurting me again like that. I sat down across the street and
watched the mansion for a while. I should have stayed there.  If I had
stayed there all night, things would have been different.  If I had
stayed, I would have been there when Deanna came out later.  Like a fool
I went back to my room. That was my first mistake. Lt. Tang gave me a
bottle of Scotch. Drinking it was the second mistake I made.  I got so
drunk I should have gotten sick.  I wanted to be sick. I wanted to hurt
more than just on the inside, but it was the worst thing to do. If I
hadn't been drunk I never would have made the third mistake. I hadn't
been back more than an hour when Wendy Roper came over.  She said she
heard I was upset about something. She wanted me. She had always wanted
me. Deanna didn't want me, she had told me that earlier.  Wendy did
though.  No strings, no commitment, hell, she could care less who I was
or what I thought.  I thought I could pretend she was Deanna. I thought
she could make me feel better, but nothing could make me feel better,
except Deanna.  Deanna coming back to me swearing that she had made a
mistake and she did want me. The thing was, Deanna did come back, and
found me with Wendy! If I hadn't gotten drunk I would be with Deanna
today.  If Wendy Roper hadn't shown up I would be with Deanna today. If
I had just stayed watching the house I would have been with Deanna
today.  Instead I'm alone - again."
	"End log." Will instructed. 
	Deanna watched him close his eyes. She came over quietly, sat
down beside him and held his hand. 
	"What did your mother have against me?"
	"She thought she could plan every aspect of my life and I would
go along with it. You didn't fit in her plans."
	"Why did Lt. Tang give me the Scotch?"
	"He probably was trying to make you feel better."
	"Who told Wendy Roper I was upset?"
	Deanna looked at Will for several seconds. "I don't know."
	"You didn't?"
	"Of course not."
	"Your mother?"
	"I don't know, I don't think so. How about Lt. Tang?" Deanna
volunteered.
	"Maybe."
	"Will, I promised Doctor Crusher you would get some rest.  Please?
Lay down.  We can talk about this later."
	"Are you going to lay down with me?"
	"No. I have to go back to work." She felt his disappointment. 
	"Okay." Will leaned over, kissing her lightly. "I want to ask
her."
	"Who?"
	"Wendy Roper, I want to send a sub-space message and find out
who told her I was upset."
	"Why?"
	"Who knew I was upset? You, your mother, Lt. Tang. That's it.
Which one would contact Wendy and why?"
	"I don't know."
	Will brushed a strand of hair off of Deanna's face. "Finding out
is important. I know it."
	"Well, then we will have to contact Wendy and ask her." Deanna
replied. "But first you have to rest and I have to report to the
bridge."

	Deanna finished writing up her report and left her office for
the day. "Computer, this is Counselor Troi, where is Will Riker".
	"Will Riker is in his quarters, asleep."
	 "Troi to Crusher".
	"Hi, Deanna."
	"Do you have a minute? I didn't have time to ask you about Will's
progress after the treatment this afternoon."
	"Come on over,  the Captain and I were just having a drink.  You
are welcome to join us."
	"Thanks.  I can't stay long. Will might be waking up soon."
	By the time, the conversation was over, Deanna was almost to
Beverly's quarters. Upon entering she saw that the Captain was on the
couch in civilian clothes, a rare sight on the Enterprise.
	"Deanna, hello there." Picard sounded truly happy to see her.
	"Come on in Deanna, actually I was giving the Captain my report
on Will.  Now I won't have to repeat myself."
	Beverly passed Deanna an obviously alcoholic drink which smelled
deliciously like chocolate. Deanna took a sniff, smiled and took a sip.
"Bev, this is quite strong."
	Crusher laughed. "Its medicinal, believe me."
	"Why is it that doctors always are the ones on a star ship to always
have the best alcoholic beverages?" Deanna teased.
	"Are they? I hadn't noticed." Beverly smiled, quite relaxed between
the drinks and the Captain's presence.
	"How is he?" Deanna asked without bothering to specify who she
was inquiring about.
	"I'm quite hopeful that the session we did today will help him
control his emotions better. That is the part of the brain where we
tried to concentrate.  I must tell you, that although we have made great
strides in understanding the functioning of the brain, this micro
surgery that we are doing is not guaranteed."
	"I understand." Deanna said.
	"Does he?" Doctor Crusher asked.
	Deanna sighed. "He doesn't have any expectations either way, I
don't think."
	"That is what disturbs me," Picard said, "His acceptance of all
of this.  That is not the Will Riker I know."
	"No, its not.  I too, was disturbed by that Captain, but I believe
that it may be a temporary thing.  I have seen signs that his strong
will still survives, though it is emerging slowly. I sense that perhaps
his personality is gradually reappearing.  He seems to be very
interested in investigating his, background, I would allow him to do
that."
	"His background." Picard stared off for a minute. "Does he want
to return to Earth, then?"
	Deanna smiled,  blushing slightly. "Maybe I should say, our
background." To Picard's unasked question, she continued, "the
background of our relationship. There seem to be some holes I can't fill
for him that he insists on pursuing." 
	The silence in the room was palatable. Deanna knew she had put
them all in an embarrassing position. "He would like to make a trip to
Betazed. If he does, I would like to go with him, perhaps I can explain
things for him, help him understand."
	"Yes, when we dock next week.  You could take a transport ship
to Betazed and rendevous with us when at the Vulcan/Federation Council
celebrations in two weeks. Would that be acceptable?"
	"Yes, Sir. Thank you."
	"Counselor, I need a First Officer.  How do you think he will
react if I appoint Data as an interim First Officer?"
	"Right now, Sir. I think he will be relieved to have the pressure
off of having to recuperate quickly."
	"Somehow, I was hoping you would say he would be upset."
	"Not yet, Captain, but with time..." Deanna looked up at Bev who
gave her a small pat on the back.
	"I should go, he'll be waking up soon." Deanna headed for the
door.
	"Does he require round the clock care?" Picard asked genuinely
concerned.
	"No, but he enjoys it." Deanna replied with a mischievious grin.
	Beverly just shrugged at Picard's shocked expression.

	Deanna was glad she had returned before Will awoke. She called
up his recipe files and reviewed his list of favorite meals.  While she
looked over the menu, her mind was struggling with the problem that
Beverly had brought up. After ten minutes of reading hopelessly
complicated recipes, with Terran terms she didn't understand, she gave
up.  Learning cooking vocabulary had never been an interest of hers on
Betazed, she certainly didn't have a clue what Œparboiled' meant in any
language. Turning to the replicator she ordered a medium rare bovine
steak with a baked potatoes, sour cream, corn on the cob with butter,
salad with a hard boiled egg and Ranch dressing for Will.  Her mother
always said it had been her father's favorite meal and was usually what
she ordered for Will when he came to her quarters to eat.  That had not
happened often, since he usually preferred to cook for them in his
quarters and she was more than willing to let him.  In fact, she
thought, renewing his interest in cooking might be a good therapy for
him and certainly she enjoyed the meals he fixed. She ordered an
Andorian chicken salad for herself.  She had just set the table when
Will emerged from the bedroom.
	"How long have I been asleep?" He was still wincing at the bright
light.
	"Let's see - about six hours."
	He smiled shyly, "I guess I had some catching up to do after
last night."
	Deanna smiled at his comment, took his hands in hers, wrapping
his arms around her waist. It had been a long time since she had allowed
his thoughts to stimulate her. She realized how tired she had been all
these years of the effort required to keep herself from opening her mind
to him in quiet moments. She had missed the freedom of relaxing her
control and enjoying all aspects of him. "Here sit down and have some
dinner." He bent down to her with only feelings of friendship in his
mind, but she quickly turned his small kiss into a more passionate one,
then pulled away. "There's plenty of time for that after dinner, here,
eat before the food gets cold."
	"We could always heat the food up again."
	"I thought we would place that sub-space message after dinner
and then go visit the poker game tonight."
	"And what about afterwards?"
	"Afterwards, we will see how you are feeling." Her mind went back to
her conversation with Beverly. Deanna hoped Will's interest in
experimentation still existed. - As he ate she mulled over the
best way to explain alternatives to abstinence to him.

	Deanna sensed curiosity as the main emotion Will was experiencing. 
She on the other hand found this communication extremely embarrassing as
she was sure Wendy Roper would. 
	"Connection complete." the computer replied.
	Wendy Roper was in front of the view screen. "Deanna! Its good
to see you  - is Will with you?" Deanna tried to read Wendy's expression
without luck.
	"Thank you Wendy. Yes, he is. He has been in an accident and has
experienced some memory loss.  He is trying to find some answers to
questions he has."
	"Memory loss? Will, how are you doing?"
	Will leaned forward in front of the screen. "Hi. I'm afraid I
don't really remember you, but I have listened to my personal logs.  I
have a question. It might be a bit embarrassing, but it is important. To
me anyway."
	"That's okay. What is it?" 
	Deanna had never been very impressed with Wendy, but her
forthrightness was a relief.
	"The night that Deanna walked in on us..."
	"Yes." Wendy was smiling broadly. "Not one of my favorite
moments.'
	"You said someone told you I was upset.  That was why you came
over. Who told you?"
	"Oh." Wendy looked off as if struggling to remember. "I don't
know. A man. He had a deep, soft voice. Strange accent."
	"Not Lt. Tang?"
	"No."
	"Not me?"
	"Good gods, no!"
	"Okay, thanks." Will turned away disappointed.
	Deanna looked back at Wendy. "Thanks for your help Wendy."
	"Nice to see you both. When you come back to Betazed you should
stop by. I'd love to see you both."
	Deanna smiled pleasantly. "Well, we don't usually have much time
when we are on shore leave."
	"OK, well, you are always welcome. Good-bye."
	"Bye."
	"End transmission." Deanna ordered.
	Will looked at Deanna, shrugging. "A dead end."
	"Yes. Let's get ready for the poker game. Do you remember playing
poker?"
	"Not specifically, but I do think I remember the game." Will
answered.
	"I wouldn't be surprised. If you want to have some fun, pretend
you are taking pointers from me." Deanna was smiling, but inside she had
an uneasy feeling she knew who had called Wendy Roper that fateful night
so long ago.

	Geordi LaForge had picked up the weekly poker game hosting duties
after Will's accident. Stopping before the door, Deanna could sense
Will's hesitation. She squeezed his hand and rang the bell. She calmed
her own nervousness.  This was the first time her friends had seen her
and Will together since Will was injured and she was sure not all of
them were aware of the change in their relationship.  Tongues would wag
for sure after tonight.
	"Come in." Data replied, answering the door for Geordi. "Ah,
Commander Riker, Counselor Troi! We are happy you came."
	Riker stepped into the cabin and stopped, looking from left to
right before entering. Lt. Worf sat next to Geordi, who in turn was
seated next to a pretty young Lieutenant by the name of Joanna Denson.
Doctor Crusher was also seated at the table. Data, wearing his standard
dealer cap, ushered Riker and Deanna to the table.
	"I'll sit this one out Data. I'm going to help Will tonight." Deanna
insisted.
	Geordi raised his eyebrows, a reaction that everyone noticed despite
the visor. "You are going to teach the Commander how to play poker?"
	"I'm going to give him some pointers." Deanna said, pulling a
chair close to Will's. He smiled at her, kissing her cheek lightly.
Well, now the cat is out of the bag, Deanna thought, registering the
surprise and pleasure most of the guests felt at the closeness of the
two. From Worf she sensed relief. Worf had urged her more than once
to let Riker know her feelings for him. Deana had cared deeply
for Worf, but as a partner she knew she had been a disappointment to the
Klingon who resented her need to know his feelings. He had been quite frank
when he had announced his intention to leave the Enterprise declaring that
spending time with a woman who openly told you she was bonded to another was a
waste of time. A warrier should have his woman's undivided attention.
Deanna Troi could give that to no one besides Will Riker. She could feel
Crusher's shock and worry probably over a possible emotional breakdown
if the noise level of the boisterous group escalated, but the rest of
the poker crowd only were emitting feelings of relief, with the
exception of Lieutenant Denson, whose sexual attraction to Will was
mounting. Will, interestingly enough was full of anticipation, for the
poker game, Deanna hoped.
	The game started. Will constantly showed her his cards and asked
questions.  He had a terrible hand, but he continued to act like her
answers were revealing that he had a great set of cards.  Deanna found
it hard to not laugh herself at his acting, but everyone else simply
bought the farce hook, line and sinker. Will won the first game without
having to show his cards. 
	"Beginner's luck" Geordi announced unhappily.
	The second game, Will toned it down quite a bit. He had a great
hand as it turned out and refused any cards.  Naturally, everyone
thought he didn't know what he was doing and when Crusher called him on
his hand, he won a second game.
	Deanna went to get some drinks.  When she returned, Lieutenant
Denison was seated where Deanna had been, leaning close to Will. "Data,
deal me out please." Riker requested. "Lieutenant Denison would you show
me how to use the replicator to get a something to eat?"
	Deanna would have been furious, except that she could sense Will's
impatience at the young Lieutenant. The two went to the replicator,
Riker speaking in a low voice. Then Lieutenant Denison returned to her
seat next to Geordi, smiling at him as if she had never left. Will
remained at the replicator for a few minutes and then returned to where
Deanna was now seated. He placed in front of her pickled xinglas, a
Betazed appetizer. "Why did you order these?" Deanna regarded the delicacy
with curiosity.
	"You like them." Will replied.
	"How do you know that?" Deanna asked.
	"I don't know, I just know you like them."
	Beverly leaned over to Deanna. "Do you like them?"
	"Yes, but I haven't had them for years." Deanna was puzzled,
assuming that some of Will's memory was slowly returning.
	Finally, an hour after the group usually quit playing, Geordi leaned
back in his chair, claiming, "Commander! I don't believe that you have
forgotten how to play this game!"
	Will smiled. "I haven't. Deanna said she was going to give me
some pointers, not that I had forgotten how to play poker!"
	Everyone began groaning and complaining at once. Dr. Crusher
prepared herself for the inevitable emotional breakdown Will was sure to
have, except that he didn't. He simply sat with a triumphant grin on his
face, making a great show of collecting and counting his chips. Deanna
joined in the laughter, surprised herself at the emotional balance he
had maintained. Apparently the earlier treatment had worked.
	After the game, everyone filed out saying good-bye to Data and
swearing they were never playing with Riker again. Beverly Crusher
watched Will Riker start to casually put his arm around Deanna, then
nonchalantly remove it in the turbolift as the three of them started for
deck 8. Emerging, she turned left while they turned right. Unable to
resist she called back at them, "remember, our conversation today,
Deanna!"
	Will leaned down to Deanna, "What was that all about?"
	Deanna grinned, "Will, do you remember what a
fertilization-inhibitor is and when you last had one?"
	
	In Deanna's cabin, Will stared at Deanna, "Are you sure there is
no way?"
	"Reasonably. Beverly will verify it tomorrow." She could sense his
disappointment. "Will, it is a good thing.  We are not ready for a child
at this point.
	Will shrugged, then turned away, accepting the news without protest
as he often did. Deanna caught up with him, laying a hand on his arm,
"Come here Imzadi, I have something I want to show you." Deanna took 
his hand and led him to her bedroom.
	"You said..."
	"There are alternatives, Will."
	"There are?"
	"Yes, you remember poker but you don't remember that?" Deanna
scolded.
	Riker smiled. "Alternatives. Maybe they will come back to me."
	Deanna laughed, "I'm sure they will."
	
	The combination of Beverly's treatment and the poker game had
tired Will a great deal. Deanna watched his even breathing as he slept,
putting the cap to the lemon flavored massage oil back on the tall,
cobalt bottle. Beverly had told her once that the body heals itself when
it sleeps.  She watched him silently hoping it was true. She was in a
state of profound peace herself. He had given her the most sensual
massage she had enjoyed in years.  His hands were quite strong, yet
extremely gentle when he desired. He had developed years ago a manner of
massage that alternated a hard rolling of the muscles followed by a
light, caressing touch. He still retained the style.  He had started
with her lying on her stomach. Slowly he had massaged her neck, then her
shoulders and worked his way down. He pulled the muscles of her back
hard downward, then gently pushed them upward along her spine repeating
the pattern several times. Occasionally he slipped his hands under her,
touching her front and causing her to fantasize about what would happen
when the massage was over. He had taken his time making his way down
each leg, kissing her from time to time, his beard softly  stroking her
skin. Next he had carefully worked the muscles in each foot. He went
back to her midriff and instructed her to flip over. Starting at her
toes, he had worked his way up her legs, thighs, waist. Just when she
was ready to pull him close, totally disregarding Crusher's warning, he
continued to her shoulders, down each arm, each hand, each finger, then
back up to her shoulders, ending at last with her neck and face. When he
was finished, she closed her eyes, relishing the love that she sensed
from him. Lying in his arms, she nearly fell asleep herself when she
began to tenderly stroke his chest. Sitting up, she instructed him to
turn over on his stomach and she too began to roll out the knots in his
shoulders and neck, then proceed to kneed his back muscles and legs. She
had spent several minutes on the arch of each foot, then each individual
toe. Slowly she had worked her way back up to back only to feel his
contentment while he slept. Snuggling close to him, she kissed his side,
causing him to stir, then she had fallen asleep feeling fulfilled in a
way unknown to her since she first bonded with her Imzadi.

	Deanna said good-bye to Will after breakfast and headed to sickbay
before her first appointment. Entering she found Bev waiting for her. 
"Good morning, Bev! Thanks for setting up this early appointment."
	"You are welcome, counselor.  How did last night go?"
	"We behaved."
	"Good! Now here take a seat.  This shouldn't take too long." Deanna
watched Dr. Crusher frown, retrieve her tricorder, frown, pass another
instrument over Deanna and frown more deeply. Deanna began to grow
worried. She expected her friend to simply announce there was no doubt
that she was not pregnant and order her out of sickbay. Now she was
beginning to have doubts.
	As if reading her mind, Crusher began, "Deanna, you are not
pregnant, but there is a problem... You appear to be unable to get
pregnant."
	At the worst possible moment, Will walked in for his appointment.
Seeing Deanna and Crusher he walked over. Deanna attempted to hide
her anxiety, but with the bond renewed he realized she was upset. "What's 
wrong?" he asked.
	"Nothing," Beverly said returning to studying her tricorder intently.
	Deanna started to agree, but then hesitated. Lying was not something
she was going to do with Will Riker. "Beverly has just told me that she
doesn't think I can have children."
	Will stared at her for a minute, unable to react.
	"Beverly, what about Ian? I was pregnant with him?" Deanna
asked.
	"Who?" Will interrupted.
	Deanna felt his anxiety level rise. "Its a long story. I was
impregnated by an alien that wanted to see what is was like to be human.
It was a non-corporal entity."
	Will's puzzled expression almost made Crusher laugh, except she
knew had badly Deanna had always wanted children. "Deanna, I don't begin
to understand what happened then, but it was hardly a normal pregnancy.
There is one thing though that puzzles me..." Doctor Crusher went into
her "research role", as Deanna always thought of it. Once the good
doctor latched onto had a theory and there was no interrupting her until
she had either proved or disproved it.
	Will stroked Deanna's back as they waited until Crusher was ready to
discuss whatever hypothesis she was investigating. At last they heard,
"Ah-ha! I thought so!"
	"What?" Deanna asked?
	"Tell me about the Betazed practice of genetic bonding." Crusher
waited.
	"I don't know much about it. My mother only told me...No! They
wouldn't have."
	"What?" Will asked looking from one woman to another.
	"Genetic engineering? That's illegal!" Deanna whispered.
	"Deanna, did you ever know anyone else while you were growing up
that was Œgenetically bonded'?" Crusher asked.
	"No." Deanna looked at the floor. "They wouldn't have." She
repeated.
	"They did. Deanna, you can only get pregnant with one man in the
universe. Wyatt Miller!"
	"Who the hell is Wyatt Miller?" Will's loud voice rose, drawing the
worried glances of several orderlies who were talking nearby.
	Despite the storm brewing in her heart towards her parents, Deanna
had to join Beverly in laughing at Will's first burst of real anger
since the accident.
	"All right. Let me tell you the good news!" Beverly interjected.
	"There is good news?" Deanna asked.
	"Yes. I can reset the gene so that you can get pregnant by any
human male you select. The only limitation is that you can only get
pregnant by one male, whoever's genetic code I slip in."
	Will smile spread. "Good." he announced, somewhat annoyed by the
women's laughter.
	"Why would they do this?" Deanna asked Beverly, who simply
shrugged.
	"Why didn't your mother ever tell you?" Will wondered aloud.
	
	End Chapter 3