Chapter 8 The Time Conundrum

	Deanna climbed into the ground transport that Kyle Riker had 
stationed outside the Troi house. She waited in the front seat, her cold
stare focused far off. Her mother climbed in the rear seat, watched her 
daughter for a few minutes and then said, "Well, where to now?"
	"To the Enterprise." was Deanna's only reply.
	
	During the trip to the Enterprise over the next two days Deanna Troi 
hardly talked to Kyle Riker or her mother. Instead, she focused her 
considerable powers of concentration on unraveling the mysteries that stood 
before her. "Unravel the mysteries if you can." Will
had said. She was determined to do just that and she was going to enlist the
aid of the greatest detective that existed in the twenty-fourth century.

 	Lwaxana Troi eyed Data suspiciously. "This is the greatest detective of the
24th century?"
 	Sitting on a chair in Data's quarters, Deanna shot her mother a warning 
 look, "Yes, so show some respect."
 	"Always my dear." Lwaxana puffed up, resembling a giant peacock in her elaborate
dress of purple satin that ballooned out around her. Around the bodice a rainbow
of material was gathered which fell behind her as a giant plumage. Pointing to 
the terminal screen before her, Lwaxana began speaking in an authoratative 
voice as she typed on the keyboard before her. "I have an idea of how we
may be able to go back in time to uncover what Will's mission was. Twenty-three 
years ago, archaeologists on Betazed uncovered an
amazing discovery, the implications of which were so profound that only
a few in our government knew about it."
	"A time pod!" Data announced.
	Lwaxana was disappointed to have her thunder stolen from under her,
"How did you know!"
	"Because a time traveler from the past came aboard the Enterprise in
just such a vehicle." Deanna explained., "But I don't understand. Will
didn't seem to recognize the vehicle when Rasmussen arrived on the
Enterprise."
	Data typed a few more commands on his terminal. "Mrs. Troi, the
alpha-omega password - do you know it?"
	 "I can't give that to you!" 
	"Of course not, Mrs. Troi, but would you enter it for me?" Data
waited patiently. "I could try all combinations, it would delay us and
any authorities who find out will still assume you gave it to me.
However, if you just type it in, no one's suspicions would be aroused
and I can cover myself so that no audit would reveal that I have
penetrated the system."
	"I could be thrown in jail for this." Lwaxana fumed as she entered
the code.
	"Actually, as a daughter of the fifth house, you could be put to
death through lethal injection according to ancient tradition." Data
said as calmly as if he were discussing the chemical composition of a nova.
	 "Now you tell me." Lwaxana turned to Deanna, but found no support
there so she returned to watching Data work.
	 "Ah! I have it!" Data announced in his best Sherlock Holmes
imitation.
	Deanna strained to stare into the small screen around Lwaxana and
Kyle. "But Data, that doesn't look like the time pod we saw."
	"Not outwardly Counselor, but the dimensions are the same, except
the width has been extended to equal the length, forming a square. The
internal system schematics are identical.  This is a disguised version
of Rasmussen's time pod. The markings and coloring has been changed as
well.  If this is what you thought a time machine looked like, then you
would have little reason to recognize Rasmussen's pod as anything other
than a ship."

	"So," Kyle Riker began, "What do we know now? We know that Xerxli
probably recruited Will for a mission, maybe with Star Fleet's
knowledge, maybe without. That Will had doubts whether he would return."

	"So it must have been a dangerous one. He probably had to go back
in time." Lwaxana added. "I don't understand that. If he had to go back
in time why does he have to wait 20 years to marry you?" 
	"Who says he has to wait 20 years?" Deanna demanded.
	Lwaxana waved her hand in the air in the manner of a matriarch
about to embark on a lecture, "Admiral Xerxli told that to Will when he took him
out of the room at the base. He only had eleven months left to wait. I
saw it in Will's mind when he rejoined us."
	Data began to pace, stopped, puffed his pipe, and resumed pacing, finally
stopping in front of Counselor Troi. "That would make sense if the
Commander also went forward in time and had to be quiet until he could
no longer change the time line. That means that the Commander's mission
somehow requires him to appear here in our time in eleven months."
	"But why? Is he fixing the time line or damaging it?"
	Kyle Riker sat back watching the other three skeptically. "There is
another possibility. That Admiral Xerxli is manipulating Will right now,
and that Will never went on any kind of mission for him, but is about to
be used for a mission unwittingly."
	"What about the medallion?" Lwaxana asked.
	Kyle Riker let out a slow sigh, reminding Deanna of Will's own habit
of literally letting off steam. "It could have been planted to make the 
story believable. It would be a small matter to break into a storage 
vault and plant evidence."
	"What are you saying? That all these mysteries are just our
imaginations?" Deanna turned to her Data who stared back blankly, then 
turned to the elder Riker.
	"I'm saying Will remembers nothing.  It would be very easy to
manipulate him right now. He is dependent on others to tell him what
happened in his past - what if Admiral Xerxli recruited him for a
mission nineteen years ago, but has told Will something very different
from what actually took place.  Maybe the mission was secret, but there
was no twenty year time limit, maybe that is made up."
	"Why?" Lwaxana asked.
	"I have no idea." Riker said.
	"All right." Troi rubbed her aching head. "Mother, you and Kyle should
return to Betazed in case Will needs our help. There is a transport ship meeting
the Enterprise in one hour. I'll stay here to continue
my investigations for another day and then join you. Data, Will has two years
of personal logs that have been erased. Can you think how to restore
them?"
	"Of course, Counselor, I have instituted a triciary back up system
for Enterprise personal logs for historical purposes. I periodically
dump to storage disks onboard. How far back do you need to go?"
	"Quite a way. Would that include a back up of logs that Commander
Riker would have from before he arrived on the Enterprise?"
	"Normally, no, but Commander Riker gave me a set of logs with
expressed orders to reveal them to no one except Captain Picard or
yourself if you should so direct me. Can you supply the required dates?"
	"Yes." Deanna realized she was trembling as she learned that at last she
might be able to listen to the missing tapes.
	"Then I can provide you with the logs you request."
	As Lwaxana and Kyle headed for the door, Deanna called out, 
"Mother, stay out of trouble."
 
	Will sat in the room facing Admiral Xerxli, watching the elderly Vulcan 
Star fleet Medical Officer slowly put away his equipment. His tall Vulcan assistant, 
who appeared to be barely twenty years old was seated next to the Betazed 
minister. Both sat across the room from where the doctor had conducted his examination.
The doctor put a hand to his back as he straightened up with considerable effort 
before pronouncing, "He has no memories prior to the accident."
	"So, now do you believe me?" Will tried to ignore the humiliation he felt
as a result of the Vulcan mind probe, to say nothing of Xerxli's own mental
probes deep into Riker's thoughts.
	"I'm sorry, Commander, I know this is hard for you, but it is
necessary." Xerxli leaned forward studying Riker closely. "Deanna
Troi, her mother and your father are missing from Betazed. Do you know
where they are?"
	Fear, then worry were the Admiral's answer. "Very well, then. You
are under direct orders not to reveal anything to anyone of what you
have learned here, am I clear?"
	"Admiral, you have not TOLD me anything!" Will said, determined to 
hold his anger in check in hopes of learning just what the Admiral was 
trying to learn. "Other than I was on a secret mission and that I could 
change history if I marry Deanna Troi before the 20 years are up. 
What could I tell someone?"
	"You could reveal that you were not on the Potemkin when you were
supposed to be! You could reveal that two years of your personal logs
were deleted.  Do you know who deleted them?" The admiral was shouting.
	"You!" Will shot back.
	"No, you idiot! We don't know who took the logs, but it might be
someone who could rob you of the opportunity of ever marrying your
Imzadi. Riker!  I am NOT your enemy! Don't you get it? I have protected
you for nineteen years. I am the only hope you and Deanna Troi have now
that you two have started to delve into mysteries that were never meant
to be solved!"
	"Mr. Homm!" Will rose up in the seat. "You said Deanna, her mother
and my father were missing.  What about Mr. Homm, the servant?"
	"I am not at liberty to reveal that information." The Admiral sat
down slowly.
	"Admiral. Please tell me. What was the mission I went on nineteen
years ago. What happened? Why was the medallion of honor in the security
vault? Who stole my personal logs? What is going on? Why is Deanna in
danger?"
	"The best thing for everyone actually, might have been if the
Lieutenant Allen had aimed a little higher!" Exasperated, Admiral Xerxli left the
room without another word.
	"Some protector!" Will thought to himself, smiling as he felt the
Admiral's quick probe of his mind abruptly stop.

	"Beverly! It's good to see you again!" Deanna entered the Sick Bay
hoping to enlist the help of her friend.
	Dr. Crusher looked up from her experiment. "Deanna! I wasn't
expecting you so soon! Where's Will?"
	"It's a long story. Beverly," Deanna hesitated not knowing where to
begin, "I need your help."

	"So you and Data are going to go through Will's personal logs hoping
to find out what happened to him on this mission?"
	"Yes, but Data thinks we should check our medical logs too, just to
make sure no one else has been trying to find out anything."
	"Like what?"
	"Like the extent of Will's memory loss. It makes sense if someone is
worried about him revealing information, that they might try to access
his medical log to determine what exactly he can remember."
	"Just a moment. Computer play medical log of Commander William T.
Riker, visual only."
	Deanna scanned the screen next to Doctor Crusher. "It doesn't show
that anyone other than members of the medical team have reviewed his
logs."
	"Well, that's good, right?" Beverly walked over to the replicator.
"Want something to drink?"
	"Yes, tea. Now I'll check my file. Beverly, what's this?" Deanna's 
face lost all its color. She sank down onto the chair, struggling to
regain her composure. "Beverly, Why was Will looking at my medical records?"
	Dr. Crusher heard the near panic in Deanna's voice and rushed over
to her friend's side. "What? Let me see."
	"Oh, look at the date. That was when we had the Alurian virus scare
three years ago, remember? Eighty percent of the ship was sick and most
of the medical staff. We were so short staffed that the Captain had Will
help review the senior staff medical logs to make sure no one had ever
contracted Lynomia's Disease.The vaccine would have proven fatal
in such cases. I'm sorry, Deanna. He did have personnel clearance to review any
medical file.  What's wrong?"
	Looking at the floor, Deanna fought to regain her composure. He
knew. He had known for three years and never said anything. He had never asked
for an explanation, never inquired about why she hadn't told him. Was it he hadn't
cared or had he cared so much he was unwilling to have her relive the pain?
	"Deanna? What is wrong? Oh, my God. Deanna, I never thought."
Beverly raised her hand to her face as she slipped the pieces together. "Will
was the father, wasn't he?"
	"Yes."
	"But he knew anyway, so "
	"I never told him."
	"You? Why not?"
	"We had a fight, Bev. I told him it would never work out and I never
wanted to see him again. He was hurt. His method of recovery was to seek
out another woman for companionship.  I found him with her. Then he got
shipped out early for the Hood and we never had time to work things out.
When I realized I was pregnant, he was gone. I was hurt. I was angry. The 
baby died. Then what was the use? There was nothing he could have done. 
When he came back into my life, I decided I would wait until after we were
married to tell him. We made plans but when his career took off we didn't get 
married. It just got harder and harder."
	"Deanna, you never told me what happened. Your medical record indicates 
there was a successful pregnancy, but no more. You've never mentioned a baby."
	Deanna felt the grief building up again. Grief that still bore the sharp
pain after nineteen years. "No, I didn't. Excuse me Beverly, I, I need to go." 
Stumbling into the hall, Deanna made her way blindly toward her quarters, 
realizing that her mother had been right all these years, it was going to be
worse now that he had found out on his own, but perhaps because of the
accident Will had no memory of that discovery.
	In her office, Doctor Crusher reviewed the medical record of Deanna
Troi finally spotting the answer to her question. "Damn! Oh, Deanna,"
Crusher swore to herself, "You poor thing."

	Deanna waited for Data to join her in her quarters with the missing
logs. On impulse, she turned to the computer, "Resume personal logs of
Commander William T. Riker, password: Haven.

	Bringing her hot chocolate back to the couch, Deanna leaned back to
collect herself. She had just finished listening to Will's description
of seeing her medical log during the Alurian virus epidemic. Anguish
mixed with guilt filled the log. His comments were full of anger
directed at no one and everyone. Quickly she verified that after the
accident, Will had listened to this tape the day before his trip alone
to the university on Betazed, no doubt to look into file on Triloxide.
By now she realized, he would have put together what had happened.
	Deanna waited for Data to return with the missing logs. He rang her
door, entered, handing her the logs. He stood patiently waiting for
Counselor Troi to began to play them. "Did he give you the password?"
Deanna asked.
	"Password: checking....Password: Amore." the Android replied.
	Deanna smiled. What a romantic. "Computer, play personal log of
William T. Riker, star date: 2359.
	"Personal Log supplemental. Deanna, this is the only copy of my logs
for a two year period. When you have finished listening to them, have
Data erase them. There are no others - I have destroyed them. You must
be very careful that these don't fall into anyone else's hands. I had
them in a storage vault on Betazed, but I made this copy and erased the
logs in the vault. I'm not supposed to tell anyone what I am going to
reveal to you, but I can't go to my grave with you thinking I was such a
coward that I just didn't show up at Risa, or that I wasn't capable of
choosing between you and a Star Fleet career.
	"Personal Log of Lt. William T. Riker. I don't have much time to
record this log. I received a message a short time ago from Lwaxana Troi
in response to my request to marry Deanna.  Basically I have to help the
Defense Minister of Betazed on an "unofficial" mission. I'm on loan from
Star Fleet, but this can't be good - I had to volunteer. Lwaxana
provided an added incentive though. It seems she can break my link to
Deanna at any time if I don't 'volunteer' to help Xerxli. They both
promised this mission won't take long though and I can still be back to
meet Deanna at Risa. Lwaxana says I will be back so soon that I don't
even need to tell Deanna about the trip. Just to be safe I did send my
father a message by courier. Each day I will store my log in a storage
vault until I leave.  If I return I can retrieve the logs then. I sent
my father the code. If something happens to me and I don't make it back,
Deanna will discover why I haven't returned. Something doesn't feel
right about this  mission to me. End log."
 
	"Personal Log Lt. William T.Riker. Well, I found out why Xerxli was
so anxious to get me to volunteer for this mission. Seems the Betazed
government wants someone 'loyal' to Betazed who can pilot a ship. Being
engaged to the daughter of the fifth house got me the honor since
Betazed has no other citizens in Star Fleet that are a good candidate for the
mission."

	"Personal log of Lt. William T. Riker. This log will have to do for
a will and testament as I have no time to officially record one.
Everything I own I bequeath to Deanna Troi.  
	Betazed is under attack from a race from the future. Their ability
to travel through time provides great tactical advantage. They have been
kidnapping Betazed citizens and stealing information and samples of
Tricarbonide, a compound derived from the ill-fated Triloxide pill
developed to reduce problems with inter-species pregnancies. Triloxide
was an experimental drug, but a group of Ferengi technicians forged the
Federation Medical tests to indicate it was safe. It contained a
dangerous, unstable compound that caused babies throughout the
Federation to be born with horrendous birth defects a few years ago. A
derivative of the toxin in Triloxide was found to help near telepathic
species develop enhanced telepathic abilities. It is ironic that the
same element that caused such turmoil among so many families now holds
the potential to help so many make the evolutionary jump to
telepathy. This drug, Tricarbonide, is apparently what the time
travelers are interested in most. Why the time travelers are so
interested in Betazed and telepathy is unknown, but discovering the
answer to that question will be part of my mission.
	 One of the time capsules has been captured and guess who is going
to be trained to fly it? I told Xerxli I had to be finished with this
assignment in one week in order to meet Deanna on Risa, but I can tell
from his reaction, that he doesn't expect me to make it back. I'm
beginning to think my 'mission' is to get the capsule to a key point in
time. I don't think they are worried about me returning it. I wish I had
written Deanna before I left. I don't like the feel of this at all."

	"Personal log of Lt. William T. Riker. I leave for my mission in 30
minutes, but am recording this last message beforehand. Deanna, I found
a miniature explosive and a device that looks like a tracking device
hidden onboard the time capsule. I wasn't supposed to notice it. Admiral
Xerxli came up to see me about an hour ago with a medallion he said the
government wanted me to have. He said I should send it to my father for
safe keeping.  It is the Betazed Medallion of Honor, like the one your
great-grandfather received. Remember showing it to me?" Deanna listened
to Will's voice break, "They think I don't know what this means. I know
now I'll never see you again. I love you Deanna. Remember, I always
loved you, Imzadi."
	Data sat down next to the shaking body of Counselor Troi, wrapping
his arm around her as she buried her head in his chest. "Counselor,
remember, he did make it back."
	Looking up she smiled, "Yes, he did, didn't he? But how?"

	"Personal log of Lt. William T. Riker on board the Pegasus. I never
thought I would see my old quarters. I tried everything but in the end,
the solution that Star Fleet left me with was the best one possible.
Twenty years. That is how long I have to wait. Twenty years. Star Fleet
has put a ban on any revelation on my part in the mission for twenty
years so I can't tell Deanna why I never made it to Risa. Deanna won't 
answer my messages and Lwaxana isn't helping at all, but I have twenty 
years to win Deanna back."

	Twenty log entries later, there were still no more references to
what happened during Will's mission. Frustrated, Data turned to Troi,
"Counselor, I do not think we are going to find our answers here in the
logs. Obviously, once the Commander returned, he felt no compulsion to
reveal what happened."

	"Data, these logs were our only hope at finding out what occurred
during that mission." 
	"Not necessarily." Star Fleet would have had an on-board historical
recorder active in the time capsule. 
	Deanna threw up her hands, "Even one they were planning on blowing
up?" 
	"Good point."
	"I need to return to Betazed. Will will be released in another 2 days
and I still have a mystery my mother hasn't answered yet."
	"Which one is that Counselor?"
	"It's a rather private one, Data."
	"I understand."
	"Have you deleted Will's files?"
	"On your command."
	"Make it so."

	Deanna was standing on the transporter pad when the Transporter
operator signaled her to wait for a moment.  Breathlessly, Beverly
Crusher came running in. "Deanna, I have to talk to you for a moment!
I've discovered a mystery!"
	After rescheduling the transport, the two walked to Deanna's office. 
Closing the door, Deanna turned to her friend, "So Beverly, what is your mystery?"
	"Not mine, Deanna, your's.  How could you get pregnant by Will if
you were genetically bonded to Wyatt Miller?"
	"Actually, Beverly, that was exactly the question I was going to ask
my mother!"
	"Unless, you weren't genetically bonded to him when you were 7 but
at a later date!" The doctor paused dramatically, "like AFTER you were
pregnant."
	"Why, would my mother have me genetically bonded to Wyatt AFTER? Is
that even possible?"
	"Well, yes, theoreticly."
	"But why?"
	"To ensure you didn't get pregnant by Will again?"
	"Beverly,  I never told you what happened"
	"Deanna, I saw the reference to the Triloxide. I was stupid not to
have noticed before. I'm so sorry."
	"Yes." Deanna took a deep breath, "You know then that there was no
genetic problem involved between Will and me. If I hadn't taken the
Triloxide, there would have been no problem with the pregnancy or after
the birth. The only reason I could think of that my mother would have
done such a thing would be to try and convince me to marry Wyatt instead
of Will, but she knew we were Imzadi, surely she wouldn't have held much
hope out for that."
	Beverly chewed her lip nervously, "Deanna, I want to come with you
to Betazed. I already told Captain Picard and he approved my leave for a
few days during the conference. I might be able to get some information
from the hospital. You would have had to go to the hospital to have the
procedure performed and Betazed doctors are notorious for resisting Star
Fleet regulations on disposal of medical records for civilians.  Maybe I
can learn something. The only thing I don't understand is why don't you
remember having the procedure done?"
	
	At the Troi mansion, Will Riker traced his path around the
living room floor. "William, quit pacing, you are going to wear a hole in
my carpet." Lwaxana turned to her new servant, a young Orion giant.
"Prepare the dinner and announce when it is served."
	Will resumed his pacing, stopping briefly to peer out the heavily
drapped windows as if he could see Deanna arrival. "Lwaxana,
when did you say Deanna would arrive?"
	"I told you her transport is scheduled for 2000 hours. That was 
fifteen minutes ago. She should be here any minute."
	Will tried to force himself to sit still, Data's message had indicated 
that she was fine, but he would feel better when he saw her safe. He
realized he was actually nervous to see her. He was looking forward to talking
to her about the child. His child. Their child. He hadn't known what the
implications of Triloxide were when he heard the term used in his log
describing his reading of Deanna's medical log. His trip to the
university had explained a great deal, but he found he had more questions now
than he had before. 

	He stopped in the middle of the room, receiving the familiar warmth
that always accompanied Deanna's approach. Opening the huge door, the
Orion servant stepped aside as Beverly Crusher entered the mansion.
"Will!" Beverly ran up to him throwing her arms around his neck.  It is
so good to see you! How are you?"
	Taken aback and still straining to see Deanna, Riker's flashed his
trademark smile, "I'm fine. I wasn't expecting to see you here. What's 
wrong sick bay lonely without me on board to entertain your medical staff?"
	Deanna entered and stood in the foyer watching the two friends
together. Laughing at their embarrassment as they quickly let go of each
other, she walked deliberately over to Riker. Even since their
resumption of their relationship, she had not projected to him often,
but today she sent one word, "Imzadi." To her delight, he responded in
kind before wrapping his arms around her.
	"I didn't think they would let me see you!" Deanna began.
	"Well, they can't lock me up. I didn't commit a crime." Will
laughed, but Deanna noticed he seemed relieved when Lwaxana announced
that dinner was served. The dinner was a stiff affair. Will dodged every
question Lwaxana posed until finally, all discussion ceased. Rising, 
Will turned towards Deanna, "I have to get back or Xerxli is liable to
call out Security to find me." He kissed her on the cheek, pulling away when
she started to reach out to him. "I'll, I'll see you in the morning, okay?"
	"Okay." 
	Will watched her closely, knowing that she was hurt by his actions. "I
love you Deanna. You have to trust me a little bit." Before she could answer
he had fled through the door into the moonless Betazed night.
	
	Early the next morning, Beverly Crusher walked into the Jalara Medical 
Center's medical records bank with all the confidence of a long time employee.  
Sitting down at a terminal she entered the administer password Data had supplied
and began searching the record banks for a clue as to when the genetic
engineering procedure had been performed on Deanna Troi. 

	In the meantime, Will reluctantly walked from the base to the Troi
mansion. Admiral Xerxli had protested his leaving the base, but the
Commander had pointed out again that unless he was under house arrest or
a charge of a crime was brought against him, no one could detain him.
	Reaching the steps of the Troi mansion, he stood for a moment,
trying to decide whether to wait until Deanna brought up the subject of
their child or not. The massive door opened, not by the servant's hand,
but by Deanna's. She regarded him for a moment before taking his hand and
leading him to the garden.  She had not spoken a word and Will worried
she was building the courage to ask him about what he had learned from
Xerxli. Instead she motioned for him to sit, taking a seat next to him.
She pointed to a small, flat stone surrounded by a brilliant blue flower
in full bloom that Will didn't recognize. "I wanted," Deanna stopped for
a moment. Squinting Will bent down to study the stone. There was a date
and a name, Alyssia Riker, 2359.
	Will stared at the stone before asking, "My last name?"
	Biting her lip, Deanna answered, "Well, we weren't married. It
should probably have been Troi, but we were Imzadi and according to
Betazed tradition, the Imzadi bond is considered more permanent than a
marriage bond, so my mother followed our tradition and listed your
name."
	Nodding Will stood up his gaze never leaving the stone, as if he would
find some part of his daughter reflected in its smooth surface,
"Alyssia?"
	"We had talked once in the jungle about our favorite names. We
had both announced at the same time our favorite girl's name was Alyssia
and agreed that's what we would name our first daughter." Deanna
stopped, trying to calm her shaking voice. "My mother went through my
logs to try and find an indication of a name that I liked. I had
recorded the story in my log when I returned from the jungle, so she
used the name she thought we would want."
	Slowly he sat down next to Deanna, wishing he felt something, but he
felt no loss, no grief, just an ache in his heart for Deanna having
borne this secret for so long alone. Gently he brushed a stray hair from
her face, "Why did you mother chose the name, was that a tradition too?"
	"No, I was" Deanna hesitated, swallowed, then continued, "I was in a
coma and couldn't,"
	A knot rose in Will's throat as he watched Deanna try to talk about
what had happened. He fought the tightening of his own chest as he
waited for her to regain her composure enough to continue. "How long?"
The words came so softly he wasn't sure she would hear them.
	"Six weeks." Bringing her face down to her hands, Deanna tried to
calm herself. Without opening her eyes, she felt Will's arms around her,
drawing her close, his kiss lingered on her head.
	Quietly he asked, "How long did the child survive?"
	"Three weeks."	
	"Why wasn't she placed in the mausoleum?"
	"My mother thought a child would prefer to rest in a garden and I
think Mother wanted to be able to see her every day."
	He sat listening to her cry, stroking her hair, realizing that she
had never seen the child either. While he wanted to console Deanna, he
felt no connection to her loss only guilt for his inability to mourn
with her. "Is there a picture?"
	"Yes." Having anticipated the request she produced the framed
vidpict. Tiny black curls framed the small perfect face dominated by
large black eyes that seemed to be sightless. A tiny hand clutched the
curls. It wasn't until Will saw the innocent gesture that his connection
to the infant became reality. Every picture he had seen of himself as a
baby showed him clutching a lock of his hair. It was a habit his father
had insisted he had inherited from his mother. Even now when distraught,
he ran his fingers through his hair and his first
gesture of comfort to Deanna was usually to stroke her hair. Deanna felt
the shift from detached curiosity to growing attachment as Will's eyes
searched the picture. Watching him she sensed the growing sadness, then
felt him push the pain away. He clenched his jaw several times. She
watched the muscles contract and relax as he struggled to stay in
control himself.
	Finally he broke the silence, "She's beautiful!" he said in
amazement.
	Defensively Deanna asked, "What did you expect?"
	"I didn't know."
	Deanna sighed deeply, "The drug caused defects in the brain, not
physical defects. She was beautiful," Deanna's gaze fell to the stone,
"my mother tells me."
	"Alyssia." Will repeated reverently, "Yes, that is a beautiful
name." Deanna wasn't surprised he retreated back into the numbness he
had enveloped himself in before, she had done the same originally.

	Three and half hours after she entered the Center, Crusher quit the
records program, left the Center and returned to the Troi mansion.
Deanna was in the living room on the antique couch, her hand intwined in Will's. 
Neither one moved upon seeing the doctor enter, but sat waiting for any 
answers the CMO could provide.
	"Well?" Will asked. "Do you know who arranged the genetic
engineering procedure?"
	"Yes." Beverly turned toward Will, "You did."

	 "You can't!" Deanna protested as Will announced his plan.
	"Deanna, calm down, this is the only way to discover what happened.
You know what? I think I am the only one who knows what occurred.
I don't think Xerxli himself knows exactly what took place on that
mission." Will looked to Lwaxana for support. "Where is the time capsule
kept?"
	Lwaxana waited for a minute, considering the implications of Will's
question. "William, you can't operate the time capsule. You won't
remember how."
	"Yes, I do know how, Data figured it out from video footage we made
when Rasmussen's time pod was on the Enterprise. The systems are not
very difficult at all."	
	"I'm going with you!" Deanna announced.
	"No, you are not." Will and Lwaxana replied together.
	Will placed his hands on Deanna's shoulders,"The time capsule is only 
built for one person. Can you imagine the energy necessary to power such 
a piece of equipment? Two of us trying to use the capsule might mean 
we neither one return." Struggling to find a counter argument, but failing, 
Deanna slowly nodded in resignation. Will took her chin in his hand, "Don't 
you think I'll return to you?"
	Smiling, she said, "Well you are the one who complained you could
only lead an away team around the perimeter of a north pole!"
	"Travelling through time, is much easier!", he replied frowning, but
secretly he was glad to see her smile again.

The End of Chapter 8