Negative Space (a series)

An attempt to scan my entire apartment

Part 3: Yankee Pot Roast

Frozen foods have had a great impact on literature. For instance, many people don't realize that Shakespeare's tragic heroes were in fact addicted to convenience foods. Between stabbings, poisonings, assorted murders, visitations from witches and spirits of dead relatives, many of the tragic figures did not find the time to eat properly.

Hamlet, living an unusually hectic lifestyle while obsessing over the murder of his father, found little time to cook, and was heard once to remark impatiently:

	O, that this too too solid flesh would melt
	Thaw and resolve itself into a dew!
while waiting for a frozen steak entree to defrost.

Julius Caesar was given to eating junk foods to keep up with the fast paced lifestyle of a statesman. Cassius, noticing Caesar's profound weight gain, remarked to Brutus:

        Why, man, he doth bestride the narrow world
	Like a Colossus, and we petty men
	Walk under his huge legs
        Now, in the names of all the gods at once,
        Upon what meat doth this our Caesar feed,
        That he is grown so great?
Here we salute the frozen entree to die for, Swanson's Yankee Pot Roast Dinner.

Hamlet quote from "Hamlet", Act I, Scene 2.
Cassius quote from "Julius Caesar", also Act I, Scene 2.
Apparently, it didn't take Shakespeare long to develop an appetite.

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