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Last Chance
R/T, Zlanna@aol.com

Posted Oct 11, 1997

Riker watched the young girl of about twenty playing in the ocean admiring the view each time she jumped over the wave, giggling then alternatively flirting with the boy next to her. He watched, but in his mind the scene was played out a little differently. In his mind's eye he was the boy and the girl was another too. He shut his eyes against the harsh Betazed sun, but he could not shut out the memories.

Her soft foot steps left their trail in the white grains of sand that framed the green waves of the ocean that wrapped itself around the planet Betazed. Will had been waiting for her to arrive. He knew that he didn't need to locate her. He knew that she would know that he was here on her planet and that she wouldn't be able to resist seeking him out. He did not know if she would gloat or not. If she would encourage or discourage his presence. She might tell him again that he was unworthy, that he was wasting his time. She might offer him sympathy. That would be the worst he knew, for that would mean there was no hope left. If that were true, what would happen to him?

"You should have thought about that twenty years ago William when you failed to show up on Risa." Lwaxana replied but the tone was gentle. Squinting Will noticed the more conservative dress that she wore, which he found played up her handsome features much better than the flamboyant gowns she usually favored.

"Why thank you! Of course my daughter agrees with you. Just a sign I'm getting old I suppose."

His eyes wandered back to the ocean, but they were viewing a scene even more distant than the horizontal blue line that touched the sky. "We are all getting old Lwaxana. Why should you be any different than the rest of us?" Will asked.

"Yes." Lwaxana replied. "I approve." She got up and left. Lwaxana Troi always liked to make a dramatic exist and that was the most dramatic she could come up with.

"Damn!" Riker thought, "now what was it I was thinking that she was answering?"

"Should you see her and would I approve." Lwaxana answered from across the beach never turning back once to look at him.

Riker smiled until he realized Lwaxana had not told him where Deanna was. Then the smile returned. He didn't need to go anywhere. Lwaxana would make sure her daughter knew where he was.

Betazed's sun danced in the brilliant sunset with the brightest of her moons. The music of the waves lulled Will asleep and he dreamed of what he hoped to say. In his dream, Deanna Troi stood before him waiting anxiously, shifting her weight from one leg to another as nervous as he was. She leaned over him allowing tiny droplets of water to fall onto his face. Opening his eyes the blinding light of the sunset was blocked by the most magnificent view he had seen in quite a while.

"You will never change!" Deanna charged in disgust. Awakening, Will realized that she was standing over him as she had been in the dream. "How do you know it was a dream?" she replied turning to go, but not quite fast enough.

"No. Not yet." He begged.

"I thought we said good-bye last night. Why are you back?" she asked.

"Because I never could say good-bye."

"Everything is all set, Will. There is no turning back now."

"That is not true. It is never too late to call the wedding off." he replied still squinting into the sun.

Deanna looked at him, hesitating before answering. "I've left Starfleet, Captain. I am not joining your crew."

"Does he know?"

"Yes. He too has an Imzadi that," she paused wanting to choose her words carefully. "That didn't work out."

"Marry me, Deanna." He waited. He knew they were the words that she had wanted to hear last night, that he had wanted to say but that he didn't know how to say in a way that she would believe he meant them. He held his breath waiting for her response.

Deanna's anger rose at the position he was putting her in. "You couldn't say those words before. Why now?"

"Because I had to wait until I could say them without any doubts."

"You had doubts last night? You've had doubts for twenty years now suddenly you have no doubts?" The pitch of her voice was going up and her normally dark complexion included several shades of red.

"Every man has doubts, Imzadi."

"Don't ever call me that again." Actually the words came out faster and angrier than she meant for them to and the effect upon Riker was unexpected. He simply gave up. She felt it when it happened. It scared her so her anger immediately turned to a deep lonliness that felt like a bottomless chasm about to claim her, engulfing her in its depths. "Will, I didn't mean to hurt you. It is too late. We parted six months ago when I left Starfleet. Didn't you realize I would find somene else?"

"I don't care what you tell him or your mother or anyone else." Riker said, his voice so quiet she could hardly make out his words, "but I know that you love me and not him, that you will never stop loving me and that you will never quit regretting what you just said."

Deanna tried to answer, but she had nothing to say because she knew every word he had said had been true. She stayed for a long time hoping that if she talked to him long enough he would become reconciled to the marriage and his pain would subside. If she was lucky perhaps hers would as well. Eventually she gave up and retraced her steps along the beach.

Riker stood in the doorway of his ready room. He had worked so hard for this. For the most part she had been right beside him. Now that the day had come when he was finally Captain of the U.S.S. Enterprise, she was not there to share it with him. She had left in fact within a month of his promotion. In hindsight perhaps she had thought that as soon as he was Captain, he would marry her. In reality he had thought about doing so often before Picard retired, but once the promotion had come, he was so busy trying to adjust to everything he had no time to think about personal matters. Then she had come to him, announcing her resignation. It was late one night and he had just returned to his quarters after working a 19 hour shift. He had tried to explain to her that he needed time to adjust, but he couldn't argue with her logic that he had already had 20 years. Unlike before he had written constantly, sent vid com messages, and finally pulled in all the favors due him to get permision to have the Enterprise escort dignitaries to the Betazoid trade talks. This he knew, was his last chance to win her back. It was an irony that he recognized that he had lost her to pursue the career that he was now giving up to pursue her.

Captain Riker looked around his ready room. Damn, it felt good to be here. He loved being in command. It was all he had ever wanted to do, until he met her, fallen for her, loved her. After that moment, command was no longer all he had wanted, but it always remained a part of what he had wanted. The cleansing breath came quickly and unconsciously. It was hard to give it all up. He sat at his old rolltop desk, so different in tone to that his predessor had used. It was not the desk he would have chosen, but she had given it to him and he had used it gladly. He began to write the resignation letter.

An hour later, he read the letter one last time. Picard had told him once that if he ever contemplated resigning to draft the letter, then take time out for a cup of coffee. When he finished the coffee, reread the letter and see if he still wanted to send it. The cup of coffee was almost finished when his door chime sounded.

"Come."

She stood before him still wearing the same dress as she had worn the day before, her shoes were dusted with the fine white sand of the beach. Her eyes had dark circles underlying them, her shoulders slumped as if the burden she carried was to heavy to bear much longer. "Did you mean it?"

He fought the urge to give in to the hope that now leaped up, fought the desire to go to her. "Yes."

"And you have no doubts?"

The question hung for a moment, suspending the time between them, but Will knew each additional second that passed would reduce his credibility when he did answer. He knew because he had hesitated before and the result was that she had not believed him. He also knew he had to answer truthfully. "Nothing signficant."

Deanna closed her eyes trying to clear her mind of all the deadlines, all the decisions, all the things that had so preoccupied her in preparation of the wedding. She cleared her mind and her mother's words came back to her. "Deanna, the pain of the loss of your father is fresh every morning I wake up and is my companion throughout the day and my visitor throughout my dreams. But it is bearable because at least I was willing to take a chance, and that gamble brought me rewards beyond my wildest imagination." Slowly she opened her eyes and she focused on Will who was watching her with, with understanding, finally willing to let her decide their fate, willing to accept her decision for once and for all time. She knew if she rejected him now there would be no more messages, no more unannounced visits to try and win her back, no more agonizing conferences on the vidcom. Somehow it was a revelation to her. Last night was the first time that she realized if she went through with the marriage it would mean no longer having him living in the background of her life and the realization gripped her heart with terror. She could not face her life with no contact from him.

"I accept."

He watched her for a moment trying to believe what had just occurred. He waited for her to say something which would reveal that it was all a joke, but she said nothing else. "When?" he asked.

"The chapel is still booked for a week from tomorrow. It would be a shame for mother to cancel all the reservations just to have to start planning a new wedding." She probed for his reaction but found only a numbness that was starting to shift to joy. She continued, "I don't want to rejoin Starfleet though. Not yet." Somehow the sacrifice seemed small to Riker. "I just finished my resignation letter. We can go anywhere you want."

Deanna walked around the desk, eyeing the monitor. "I always considered the Enterprise my home. I think I'd like to stay here with you, Captain." She leaned over, sealing thier fate with one quick click of the delete key.

They stood so close that they could feel the other's breath but neither moved. Both realizing that this was one of those course changes in your life that sets you on a journey that will never allow you to backtrack to your point of origin. What they were about to embark on was an adventure that could bring them great happiness or deep disappointments or more likely a mixture of both. This was the moment that would mark that start of that journey. Except the reality was they had embarked on the journey years ago without realizing it. The first tentative steps taken in a small chapel on Betazed when two souls touched, drawn together by some unknown force that neither could possibly understand and certainly neither could control.

Finally Will gingerly touched her cheek and bent down as she raised her hand to his face and stretched to meet his lips. "What about what's his name?" Will asked breaking the kiss momentarily.

"He told me last night he couldn't settle for less than his Imzadi."

"What did you tell him?"

"That neither could I."

The End.

Copyright 1997 by Zlanna

I only do this for the pleasure of Imzadi fans. If you enjoyed the story or if you have suggestions, please send your comments to:Zlanna@AOL.com.