Ocean's 12 had best not suck or I'm gonna have to drop that kid who through that thing at me today at the bus stop. I need a black bath robe by tuesday! It must be BLACK, a shiny black prefferable, a silk, satin, or sheer material would be fine. Cloth or felt will also be exceptable. So check your closets coz' times a wastin. Speaking of Halloween, I think we should all skip on Monday. Just get a cold sunday night, or get hit by a car. No harm done. Plus, were seeing 'Saw' on friday. Ya.

Let me lay it even-but before that, I'd like to bring awareness to the fact that TWO (2) NEW OCEAN'S 12 TRAILERS ARE OUT! and possibly more that I don't know about. With that aside, let me return to my original topic. Tort reform.

Know you might be asking, why the fuck is he talking about Tort reform?! Let me reassure you that I am not referring to the type of tort reform that you are familiar with. Law suits have nothing to do with this type of tort reform. From this point on, when I speak of Tort reform, I am speaking of reforming the state of being in a Tort, or Tortness.
What is this Tort? It simply refers to the repetitious pattern of an experience which declines in value over time. Which sucks in many cases. Lots of time, this is unavoidable, but other times it can be changed. But lots of times, two or more consenting parties disagree about idea that prevent this reform from happening. I plan to encourage this Tort reform through the zine I'm gonna put out, hopefully making shit fun again.
time will tell, Only.

Let me lay it even-but before that, I'd like to bring awareness to the fact that TWO (2) NEW OCEAN'S 12 TRAILERS ARE OUT! and possibly more that I don't know about. With that aside, let me return to my original topic. Tort reform.

Know you might be asking, why the fuck is he talking about Tort reform?! Let me reassure you that I am not referring to the type of tort reform that you are familiar with. Law suits have nothing to do with this type of tort reform. From this point on, when I speak of Tort reform, I am speaking of reforming the state of being in a Tort, or Tortness.
What is this Tort? It simply refers to the repetitious pattern of an experience which declines in value over time. Which sucks in many cases. Lots of time, this is unavoidable, but other times it can be changed. But lots of times, two or more consenting parties disagree about idea that prevent this reform from happening. I plan to encourage this Tort reform through the zine I'm gonna put out, hopefully making shit fun again.
time will tell, Only.

I'm gonna try to start the zine this weekend, but itll take while coz I'm starting from scratch. I want to make a cruizer. What is a cruizer you ask? A cruizer is a boat that rides on land that you cruise around in, acting like pirates or navy seals. I think that would be way more fun than building a fucking tea pot out of ceramics. Speaking of ceramics, since when could you make camera lenses out of em'?! I didn't know some where transparent. I think the cruizer will take priority in my life for the moment. I'm currently drawing up some plans for a metal attack-style boat and a rustic wooden pirate boat. Did you know pirates still exist? I think that's pretty hardcore, considering the size of todays commercial freighters, and with globalization taking its toll on our world the speed that ships can get help is Speedy Gonzales-quick. Consider all previous plans on hold.

Apparently if you work at Kinkos (now FedEx Kinkos), you get some sort of perks where you can make free copies...
This means we need someone on the inside to help keep the costs low. New features for the zine:

• Serial Killer of the Month


• A VERY small sports section (by sports I mean poker and high jump)


• A Current events area, with INTERNATIONAL NEWS for all you ignorant Americans


• Other random shit that will change from month to month


• The "If Pat. Buchanan..." section will be replaced by "If ________..." where ________ is something/someone new everytime


• A fake obituaries page

More shit might come up but so far this list stands. Look for the zine to be hitting your doorsteps/mailboxes/hands/mail slots sometime around the end of this school year, and for each or every other month following that. Please feel free to submit any papers or poems or rants that you want me to include. I don't know how much it'll cost, depends on how much it costs to make it, but I'm not in the business of making a big profit, if one at all. Oh, and the cover might not be a collage anymore. Please give me any artwork to you want me to put in, coz' words alone look like shit made of black ink.

Yo, scratch the carbon fiber idea: its $100 for 3 yards of it, so fuck it.
Next-

I have two new project ideas: I'm going to restore an old motor scooter/moped and I'm gonna start a 'zine.
I wanted to restore a Vespa, but those bitches are pricey to pick up, so I guess I'll have to settle for some old vintage piece of lard. I'm thinking I'll call the zine Intellectual Void, just cause I like the sound of it. Some features will be:

• Quotes from "Queer Eye for the Straight Guy"


• If Patrick Buchanan...


• A Music Section


• A Book Section


• A Local Happenings Section


• A comics page


• Editorials


• Random Articles/rants


• A page filled with statistics

The cover will be a collage.

I have a new idea for the sofa, in terms of structural material: carbon fiber.
Very light, yet very strong. Flexible when applied, but very hard when cured.

I have to say that there needs to be a new structure in terms of weekend activities. I mean, shits gettin messed. I don't want to have to adapt to these new conditions, because that would require me changing my thinking pattern, which in turn would change my lifestyle, which in turn would change how I act. I to tell the truth, these changes would not be for the better. Not by any means.
Therefore, changes must be made. We must move forward, however also return to tradition. I think we need to start splitin shit up, or else suffer from the consequences. And I love to be blunt, so I'll spray it- the quality of people just isn't up to par with what it could be. We could have a shit load more fun (that's what life is all about) if we just made some changes.

Yo,- stop this out before it stops me:
Less we forget, if people sit on their lazy asses and cuddle all day, YOU DO NOT ADVANCE YOUR LIFE IN ANY WAY. Life dosen't mean shit when your priorities rely on what advances your ego in the currect short-period time span. I'm willing to not masturbate for a month if it means I can advance my own conscious beyond a level that it is at now. Can't finish this right now, more of this later.

I went to Boston over the weekend, and my experience reaffirmed my belief that Chicago is the best city ever.

MoMa, or the Museum of Modern Art, is going to reopen November 20 in New York city after a (yes, thats correct) $858 million dollar restructuring and renovation. If one were to compare modern art to sex, MoMa would be the Playboy Mansion.

I think I might have to re-look into how Phil's sofa is going to be made. I haven't had an particular progress on figuring out how a sofa of the kind I'm designing is made, structurally speaking. however, this isn't necessarily a bad thing. This gives me the opportunity to try to find a new type of framework, something original and innovative. Hence, I am now switching directions to designing a general system for supporting a sofa or couch type object, and using that system in different ways to create a creative, eccentric, meaningful, ergonomic, comfortable, and most importantly sexy piece of furniture-esk art.
Because of my change in plans, I will not be restricting myself only to metal as a structural material for building the framework of the sofa. I am currently looking into other viable options, such as wood, plastic, fiberglass, wire/cable, and other things. A combination of two or more types of materials is also possible.

News:
The International Film Festival is coming to Chicago, so keep your eyes peeled for anything you think is note worthy. I have already decided that on October 8th, this friday, we are all going to see The Machinist. It's part of the festival's Late Night Insanity group, and is supposed to be cool, according to my infinite foresight and a few reviews that I read. It's at 11:30 in the PM, so for all you kids with an early bedtime you best get your sleep thursday night, coz' you won't be able to sleep after you see this flick (I for one believe I can put myself to sleep anytime, so only time will tell.)

So there you have it- mark your "Hello Kitty" day planners and scribble on your hand, cause WE NEED TO BUY TICKETS IN ADVANCE. Spread the word and get the O.K. from mom and pop.