Home • Up • 300 • A Mighty Wind • Along Came Polly • American Wedding • The Aristocrats • The Avaitor • Bad Santa • Bewitched • Big Fish • Borat • The Bourne Supremacy • The Bourne Ultimatum • Bowling for Columbine • Brokeback Mountain • The Brothers Grimm • Camp • Cars • Chicago • Children of Men • Connie • Constantine • The Da Vinci Code • The Devil Wears Prada • Down With Love • Dreamgirls • Elf • Fantastic Four • Farenheit 9/11 • Finding Nemo • Hairspray • Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban • Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire • Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix • Hero • Hot Fuzz • The Incredibles • Intolerable Cruelty • The Italian Job • Kill Bill vol 1 • Kill Bill vol 2 • Knocked Up • The Ladykillers • The Last Samurai • Looney Tunes Back In Action • The Lord of the Rings:The Two Towers • The Lord of the Rings:Return of the King • Lost in Translation • Madagascar • Mambo Italiano • The Manchurian Candidate • Matrix • Matrix Revolutions • Mean Girls • Memoirs of a Geisha • Mission Impossible 3 • The Motorcycle Diaries • Mr. And Mrs. Smith • Mystic River • Ocean's Twelve • Ocean's 13 • Old School • Pan's Labyrinth • Phantom of the Opera • Pirates of the Caribbean • The Producers • Ratatouille • Rent • Sarah Silverman-Jesus is Magic • Scary Movie 3 • Scoop • Shark Tale • Shrek 2 • Shrek the Third • SiCKO • Sideways • The Simpsons Movie • Spiderman 2 • Star Trek: Nemesis • Star Wars III: Revenge of the Sith • Starsky and Hutch • The Stepford Wives • Stuck on You • Super Size Me • Talladega Nights: The Legend of Ricky Bobby • Terminator 3 • Transamerica • Transporter 2 • Transformers • View From The Top • Volver • Wallace & Gromit: Curse of the Were-Rabbit • War of the Worlds • Wedding Crashers • X2: X-Men United • X-Men: The Last Stand

Mission Impossible 3


Ethan (Generic Actor #1, see below) is convinced out of retirement when a former protégé is kidnapped by a bad guy and he's got to rescue her from bad guy Philip Seymore Hoffman. This leads to a blackmail scenario where Ethan has to steal a bioweapon while at the same time trying to get Hoffman.

What I Thought

My friends don't know who I really am. I mean, they all know "Richard", the sweet and lovable guy with the killer butt. But they don't know my secret identity of MovieMan, able to leap, um, about 4 feet and is faster typing than your average office worker.

But you, my snicker doodles, my fans, those of you who are completed by me, all know my deep dark secret and therefore I'm sure you're raising your eyebrows at my attendance and review of Mission Impossible III. With him. The Tom. Just so my face doesn't get all splotchy and explodes, let's just call him Generic Actor #1, shall we?

You could say that I was tricked, nay, hoodwinked(!) into this movie. But my friend is pregnant, she's ready to pop in a week, and her parents are babysitting their 4-year-old so that they can have their one night a year out on the town. I wanted to see Over The Hedge. But no, let's give the choice of movie to the hormonal pregnant woman. So off we four went.

Boy did I need to vent. And I ain't done yet...

So, Generic Actor #1, a role that can be filled by just about anyone in Hollywood and represents the generalizationalized (good word) blandness of America along with the mad and utter destruction of sensible taste buds by the Cheesecake Factory and the inner ear nuclear meltdown by Celine Dion (who's Canadian by the way so damn you Canadians!), furrows his brow, grapples up and down buildings, and does other pretend-manly things to entertain us, none of them involving Oprah.

I wrote that previous paragraph solely to use the word "generalizationalized", you realize that, right? And to insult Canadians (whom I love. Except you two. You know who you are).

So anyway, the storyline is pretty straightforward. Evil arms dealer, check. Bioweapon, check. Evil arms dealer blackmails Our Hero (Generic Actor #1) to get it for him, check. Lots of couch hopping, check.

Hoffman is fantastic as the cold and evil arms dealer. I've always ignored him because he's always done supporting roles, but in this movie I can see what the critics like in him. I'm going to have to TiVo Capote when it makes the rounds.

I'm a little disappointed that the action isn't bigger. I was expecting for a summer flick to have more explosions and more action sequences. But maybe I'm just biased against um, you know.

Overall, it was a very light popcorn movie with not much else. Granted, it was LOADS better than the first two. It actually had a storyline you could follow! Can Generic Actor #1 handle THAT truth? And just like Generic Actor #1, the movie is ultimately forgettable, though it still kills 2 hours of a rainy day. If you choose to accept it, that is.

Dum dum da da dum dum da da... tiii ta doooo... tiii ta doooo.... This review will self destruct in five.....


All photos and text copyright Ryszard Kilarski, unless otherwise noted. Clip art, drawings, paintings are either free domain or copyrighted by the artists.