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X-Men: The Last Stand


In the third installment of the X-Men movies, Magneto is up to no good (as always) with building up his Brotherhood of Mutants against a new vaccine that "cures" mutants. Additionally, the X-Men have a handful in the newly-resurrected Phoenix (aka Jean Grey). Put those two together and you have a mutant mess.

What I Thought

My brain is empty this week. Yes it is. I just recently finished my kitchen at home and I'm still thinking about toekicks, molding, and hardware. Oh, and cleaning under the cabinets. And sanding. And paint touch ups.

I guess what I'm saying is that why is it that mutant powers aren't all that useful at home? I mean, why do we only get to choose between a can-opener (Wolverine) and an icemaker (Iceman)? Why can't Marvel come up with The Installer whose mutant powers are to install anything in the world? Or maybe Permiter, able to create permits as needed? FlourPower for all your baked goods?

But I digress. Not that I started with any point, so maybe I just gress.

All your favorite mutants are back. Unless your favorite mutant is Nightcrawler, in which case scratch that.

Yes, I liked the movie because I'm a nerdy geek. But if shoved against a corner, I would say this movie was the weakest of the three. Here are my reasons:

Bad Reason 1: Juggernaut's stupid hat. One of the new mutants introduced in the movies, he just looks silly in his costume.

Bad Reason 2: Rewriting Phoenix's story too much. In the books, the Phoenix is the universal embodiment of emotion and is a fundamental force with the power to destroy everything. In the movie, not so much. I'm not exactly asking for the big showdown on Earth's Moon with Dark Phoenix with the X-Men against the intergalactic Shi'ar Empire. But I did want to see Phoenix a *little* closer to her roots. And I don't mean her hair.

Bad Reason 3: Phoenix's red hair looked soooooo fake.

Bad Reason 4: No Phoenix effect. What's up with that? You introduce one of the most important characters from the books and don't even once see the flaming bird?

But there are also plenty of goodies:

Good Reason 1: Storm's character is much more developed. And I love her hair.

Good Reason 2: Storm's hair.

Good Reason 3: Shadowcat (i.e., Kitty, the girl who can walk through walls) and Colossus (the metal guy who we briefly saw in the 2nd movie). Two of my favorite characters finally have roles.

Good Reason 4: This should have been Good Reason 1: Sir Ian McKellen and Patrick Stewart. I just love them.

Good Reason 5: The other mutants: The Beast!! Angel (with a tiny role). We meet Callisto and the Morlocks, Multiple Man (who rocked!) and others I don't remember. In the credits you also see Psylocke, Siryn, and a few others but it was hard seeing them in the movie.

The storyline itself is a little lame, but not too lame. Again I enjoyed it, but non-fans or non-readers may not.


All photos and text copyright Ryszard Kilarski, unless otherwise noted. Clip art, drawings, paintings are either free domain or copyrighted by the artists.